My Eyebrows Could Do With A Trim.

Listening To Chris Moyles On Radio 1 Is The Most Miserable Thing Any Human Being Can Do, But Attending Awards Ceremonies Isn't Far Behind.

I Am 54 And Age Is Slowly Writing Itself On My Face.

If You Want To Write Something Of Length, However Modern And Radical, You Must Live The Life Of An Elderly Gentleman Of The 1950s.

Comedy Ages Quicker Than Tragedy, To The Extent That We Can't Know If The 10 Commandments May Originally Have Been 10 Hilarious One-liners.

Global Warming, The Ongoing Destruction Of The Planet, Third World Debt, The Uselessness Of The Railways, The Takeover By The Corporations, The Scary George Bush Person: All These Things Are Important And Should Be Animating Me Into Outrage. Yet Somehow They Do Not.