If I Managed The Cubs, I'd Be

Some People Asked Me If I Would Be Interested In Managing The A's. I Said A Definite No Thank You. At Night, That Place Is A Graveyard With Lights.

You Sweat Out The Free Agent Thing In November, Then You Make The Trades In December. Then You Struggle To Sign The Guys Left In January, And In February I Get Down To Sewing All The New Numbers On The Uniforms.

The Only Thing Bad About Winning The Pennant Is That You Have To Manage The All-star Game The Next Year. I'd Rather Go Fishing For Three Years.

If I Managed The Cubs, I'd Be An Alcoholic.

We Need Three Kinds Of Pitching: Left-handed, Right-handed And Relief.