You've Buttered Your Bread, Now Sleep In

A Friend Asked Her Doctor If A Woman Should Have Children After Thirty-five. I Said, "thirty-five Children Is Enough For Any Woman.

Smartness Runs In My Family. When I Went To School I Was So Smart My Teacher Was In My Class For Five Years.

When You Learn To Make Everybody Happy, You Will Possess The Golden Secret Of How To Milk The Contented Voters. But Do It In Such A Way That They Won't Think You Want Them To Vote For You Just Because You Need The Money. They Need The Money, And Besides, They Can Think Up Other Reasons If They Try.

My Mind Works So Fast. When I Think Of Something I Say It. Lots Of Times I Say It Even Before I Think Of It.

I Left My Car Parked At The Top Of Lombard Street Hill, And I Forgot To Put The Breaks On. It's The Funniest Thing. The Car Is Running Down The Hill.