The Economy Is So Bad That Bedbugs

President Obama Wants Congress To Increase The Minimum Wage. Believe Me, When It Comes To Doing The Minimum For Their Wage, Congress Knows What It's Talking About.

Halloween's Coming. Kids Get Very Imaginative In My Neighborhood. Last Year, Three Kids Showed Up As Goldman Sachs Executives And Demanded 4.5 Billion Pieces Of Candy.

I'm Glad The Government Has Shut Down. Think About It, For The First Time In Years It's Safe To Talk On The Phone And Send Emails Without Anybody Listening In.

A Man In Florida Has Been Arrested For Wearing A President Obama Mask While Robbing A Mcdonald's. To Show You How Good This Guy's Disguise Was, Instead Of A Holdup Note He Was Reading From A Teleprompter.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Is Blaming Man For Global Warming. And Today, Al Gore Agreed With Him. That's So Typical. Two Cyborgs, 'oh, Let's Blame The Humans.'