My Specialty Is Detached Malevolence.

If You Can't Think Of Anything Nice To Say, Come Sit Here Beside Me.

... [woman Suffrage] Has Made Little Difference Beyond Doubling The Number Of Voters. There Is No Woman's Vote As Such. They Divide Up Just About As Men Do.

I Live By Three Rules: I Eat When I'm Hungry, Sleep When I'm Tired And Scratch When I Itch.

My Father Always Wanted To Be The Corpse At Every Funeral, The Bride At Every Wedding And The Baby At Every Christening.

If You Have Nothing Good To Say About Anyone, Come And Sit With Me.