My Comedy Is Not Mine. It's A

Being Wealthy When No One Else Is, Is Like Being The Only One At The Party With A Drink.

While Awaiting Sentencing, I Decided To Give Stand-up Comedy A Shot. The Judge Had Suggested I Get My Act Together, And I Took Him Seriously.

I'm A Pretty Solid Christian. But Even As An Altar Boy, I Was Always Asking The Bigger Questions--you Know: If God Is, In Fact, Good, What Is All This Death I See? And If God Is Gentle, What Is All This Suffering I See? I've Found Some Of The Answers In Eastern Religion. It Explained My Christianity To Me. Good And Evil Are The Same Thing. You Can't Have One Without The Other. It's The Balance, It's The Temperance Of Things.

I'm One Of These Guys That Just Spoils The Environment. I Like Atvs And Snowmobiles. I Have A Motorcycle Up There, And I Like Cruising Through The Hills.

I Wonder If To Stare Into The Face Of God Will Drive Me Crazy. (i Wonder Who Would Blink First.)