Milk Without Fat Is Like Nonalcoholic Scotch.

The World Must Be Filled With Unsuccessful Musical Careers Like Mine, And It's Probably A Good Thing. We Don't Need A Lot Of Bad Musicians Filling The Air With Unnecessary Sounds. Some Of The Professionals Are Bad Enough.

I Never Understood Retirement. What Is The Attraction Of Retirement? I Go Down There To Florida And Look Around And I Said, My God, Who Wants This? Not Me.

We Can All Be Prouder To Be Human Beings, Because That's What They Were. They Make Up For A Lot Of Liars, Cheats, And Terrorists Among Us.

I'd Be More Willing To Accept Religion, Even If I Didn't Believe It, If I Thought It Made People Nicer To Each Other But I Don't Think It Does.

We Need People Who Can Actually Do Things. We Have Too Many Bosses And Too Few Workers. More College Graduates Ought To Become Plumbers Or Electricians, Then Go Home At Night And Read Shakespeare.