If Love Were Oil, / I'd Be

The Only Way That I Could Figure They Could Improve Upon Coca-cola, One Of Life's Most Delightful Elixirs, Which Studies Prove Will Heal The Sick And Occasionally Raise The Dead, Is To Put Bourbon In It.

God Bless Merle Haggard. He Did All The Things That Johnny Cash Was Supposed To Have Done.

Money Doesn't Grow On Trees, And If It Did Somebody Else Would Own The Orchard.

There Is Something Wrong When You Wait In Line Thirty Minutes To Get A Hamburger That Was Cooked For Ninety Seconds An Hour Ago.

The Game Of Life Is A Lot Like Football. You Have To Tackle Your Problems, Block Your Fears, And Score Your Points When You Get The Opportunity.