I Like Being Absurd. Being Silly.

Hillary Clinton Said That Libyan Leader Moammar Gadhafi Is Engaged In 'theater.' Which Explains The New Strategy To Defeat Him: Casting Him As The Lead In 'spider-man: The Musical.'

The White House Announced That It Has Rejected Several Petitions To Legalize Marijuana. They Say It Has Nothing To Do With Politics. It's Just That They Can't Accept A Petition That Was Written On A Crumpled Up Funyuns Bag.

It Would've Been Amazing [to Work As Programmer]. You're Good At Numbers, You're Good With People, You Like To Wear Shorts In The Summertime.

Nasa Is Developing Space Taxis To Shuttle Astronauts To The International Space Station. And Just Like New York Taxis, They're All Going To Be Driven By Aliens.

According To A New Survey, Almost Half Of The Voters In Ohio, Florida, And Pennsylvania Say That They Do Not Trust Hillary Clinton. Republicans Immediately Got Together And Said, 'ok, This Is A Huge Opportunity For Us. How Are We Going To Screw It Up?'