I Feel Bad For People Who Die

The White House Has Finally Found One Guy That Kinda Remembers Serving With President Bush In The National Guard. Now They Just Need To Find Someone Who Remembers Bush Working On An Economic Plan. ... I Think The White House Spent More Money Looking For This Guy Than Finding Weapons Of Mass Destruction.

They Always Say The Miss America Pageant Isn't A Beauty Contest, It's Really A Scholarship Program. If That's The Case, Why Don't We Just Put All The Contestants On 'jeopardy!' And Pick Miss America That Way? At Least You Get The Smartest One.

We're Heading For A Gov. Shutdown. This Is Serious. W/o The Gov Who Will Fail To Inspect Our Airplanes? Who Will Fail To Secure Our Borders? Who Will Put Us 14 Trillion Dollars In Debt?

Some Democrats Say The Estimated $60 Billion Dollar Cost Of A War With Iraq Could Be Better Spent At Home. When He Heard That, President Bush Agreed And Announced Plans To Bomb Ohio.

You Know, It Shows How Old I Am. I Can Remember The Good Old Days When The President Picked The Supreme Court Justices Instead Of The Other Way Around.