Donald Trump Says He’s President Obama’s Worst

People Made A Big Deal Out Of The Fact This Is The First Time A Sitting President Has Done A Late-night Show. We Tried To Have Other Presidents On, But President Bush Went To Bed Every Night At 9:00. And President Clinton Always Seemed To Have Other Late-night Plans.

My Favorite Halloween Candy Is The Candy Corn. It Comes In Four Colors: White, Yellow, Orange, Brown. Those Are Also The Stages Of Your Teeth Rotting After You Eat It.

Bob Dole Revealed He Is One Of The Test Subjects For Viagra. He Said On Larry King, 'i Wish I Had Bought Stock In It.' Only A Republican Would Think The Best Part Of Viagra Is The Fact That You Could Make Money Off Of It.

President Obama Is Currently On A Week-long Trip To Africa, Where He Will Promote Freedom, Democracy, And Economic Opportunity. I Guess He Figured It Hasn't Worked Here - So Try It Somewhere Else.

Well, It Looks Like John Boehner Will Be The New Speaker Of The House. He Is The Son Of A Bartender, One Of 12 Children. He Grew Up In A Two Room Home With Just One Bathroom, Worked His Way Through School, Became The First Person In His Family To Graduate From College. And, Sadly, Fell In With The Wrong Crowd And Wound Up In Congress.